These Are My Shoes: Niko and Anna
Niko
A few months after arriving at Higher Ground shelter in Minneapolis, Niko got up unusually early and saw a group of Mile in My Shoes runners returning from a run. He thought, “There’s got to be something magical about this. What makes them get up, where I’m at in life, and do the same thing and have a smile on their face?”
On that morning when Niko saw those runners, he had already begun the process of putting his life back together. Born in the Philippines, Niko was adopted at age three by a family living in Golden Valley. He grew up there and graduated from Hopkins High School. After a few years in the Marines, Niko had a number of jobs, but an addiction to drugs meant he never stayed at one for very long. After a bad break up and the death of his dog he says he just stopped caring.
And then his mom passed away.
“I didn’t see the light and I just kept on doing every bad habit I could get my hands on.”
He says he turned his back on his family. He continued using, and he lived, homeless, for a year and a half before arriving at Higher Ground. He says he knew he wanted a better life for himself and he wanted to reconnect with his family.
“In order for me to feel like I could be back in their life, I had to make right with myself and love myself and the first way for me to do this was to stop being so destructive and sabotaging my success. In order for me to do that is to be around positive people, I felt. And that was the answer for me.”
His first run with Mile in My Shoes was in the summer of 2019.
“It’s really changed my life ever since,” he says, adding, “It helped me, definitely, back away from using… I swore to myself that I’m not going to be under the influence while I’m doing this.”
“A lot of things went the right way after I started acting and thinking positive. And all that came from MiMS was love and compassion and understanding and I’m like, well I want to be what they have.”
A few weeks into his first season with MiMS, Niko was paired with a brand new run mentor named Anna. The two of them connected quickly, sharing their stories and supporting each other. It was Anna who ran with him during the 2019 Drumstick Dash and encouraged him to finish his first 10k.
“I’m like, oh my gosh, is this really happening, am I really doing this? This is awesome. And I finished and it was a relief that all that hard work paid off.”
16 months sober, Niko now has his own place and is studying to be an EMT. When asked if he planned on continuing to be a part of Mile in My Shoes he says, “I don’t think that’s a doubt in my mind. It’s kind of ingrained that I’m a part of something.
He says he thinks about his mother every day.
“She’s looking down from above witnessing that I’m being successful.”
Anna
“I love to run. It has brought me a lot of joy and happiness and peace.”
Born in Minnesota to parents who immigrated from the Philippines, Anna grew up in Cottage Grove. She started running at age 12 and hasn’t stopped, though over the past few years she says her running has felt stale. Then she heard about Mile in My Shoes.
“It came at a time when I was struck by homelessness, and while I haven’t been directly affected by it, you can’t ignore it,” she said. “It’s easy to write a check or venmo over a payment but it’s another thing to give your time and get to know more about the issue and meet the people who you are trying to help.”
Not deterred by being put on the waitlist, Anna joined MiMS when a spot opened up at Team Higher Ground Minneapolis in the summer of 2019. She was nervous being new, but was immediately paired up with Resident Member Niko, who made her feel welcome.
“I was a little nervous about… what do I say, what can I ask – I don’t want to overstep my bounds, offend anyone, and we just talked so easily and naturally. It really opened up the door for us to get to know one another.” she says of that first run with Niko adding that his honesty and openness about his life made her comfortable to share details about hers. Over time, she opened up to Niko about the worries she had for her niece who was struggling with addiction and mental illness.
“She was probably one major mistake away from losing it all, losing housing, being potentially on the streets.” Anna was fearful and didn’t know how to help.
Niko shared with her his own struggle with addiction and homelessness and it made an impact on Anna. She says learning his story has given her more compassion and understanding. She no longer feels shame talking about her family’s struggles. “We can talk about it,” she says, adding that she feels fortunate to have met Niko.
“The relationships I’ve developed at MiMS have really helped give more meaning to my running... I needed something more, MiMS and getting to know Niko has helped me reignite a passion and love of running. Getting out there and not taking it for granted.”
The two still discuss all the big topics: Anna’s niece, will her son play lacrosse, Niko’s job training, stories about his mom.
Niko asks, “How’s your husband with his recovery?”
“He’s celebrating his 32nd year of sobriety today,” Anna says.
“That’s awesome.”
Niko + Anna
“I think I looked at you and asked, ‘are you Filipino?’” Anna said to Niko both of them laughing at the memory. She added, a bit sheepishly, that the first time they met she thought, “Wow. He’s a tall Filipino!”
It was Anna’s very first run as a mentor with Mile in My Shoes at Higher Ground shelter in Minneapolis. She was paired up with Niko, a Resident Member, and they immediately connected over their Filipino heritage, but that was just the beginning.
Prior to that first run together, Niko had been homeless for a year and a half. After a series of unfortunate events coupled with a history of drug use and addiction, Niko’s life became unmanageable for him when his mom died. “I didn’t see the light and I just kept on doing every bad habit I could get my hands on,” he said of the time. He eventually began sleeping at Higher Ground and one morning he saw MiMS runners returning from a run with smiles on their faces and he wanted in. He showed up to run for the first time in the summer of 2019.
“A lot of things went the right way after I started acting and thinking positive and all that came from MiMS was love and compassion and understanding,” he said. “They present themselves as just a person and they treat us like a person. We could be stigmatized as a low end of the totem pole, like scum. They didn’t treat us like that,” he said, referring to the coaches and Run Mentors. “They’re there every step of the way to get us to our goal which is really awesome. It made me feel really good about myself at the end of the run, in order for me to keep on going through the day.”
One of those Run Mentors was Anna, and it turns out she felt the same way.
“You’re just easy to talk to, really friendly and warm, really interested in others,” Anna said to Niko. “After that first one, I was looking forward to seeing you again.”
“I would look forward to running with you. It’s always been nice to be myself,” Nico said in reply, “you really care about how I feel and it’s mutual.”
The two friends caught up recently to have a conversation about their experiences with MiMS. They shared memories and stories and told each other how their friendship changed them.
“You weren’t holding back, you weren’t hiding,” Anna said. “That for me was really nice and refreshing to see and it helped open up the door for me to be up front and open about the struggles my own family is experiencing.”
At the time, Anna’s niece was struggling with mental health and addiction and Anna worried that she was one mistake away from being homeless. She told Niko that his story affected her. “You enlightened me, you helped me bring more understanding and compassion in my conversations with my niece who has been struggling with similar things that you have.”
“It’s really touching to know that I did make some sort of impression on you as much as you did with me, and then some.” Niko said to Anna. “You’ve helped me out with a lot and to see that, wow, I can make a difference, and be a part of, and touch someone like that.”
The two ran together many times that fall, training for the big day when Niko would run his first road race, the 2019 Drumstick Dash 5K.
“Do you remember how cold it was that day?” Anna laughed. Niko chuckled and nodded, he definitely remembers.
At the starting line, Niko said he wasn’t nervous because he knew Anna would be there and she would look out for him. She said he seemed relaxed and at ease. The two of them and one other Run Mentor set out to run the 5K, one lap around Lake Harriet, but there was a change of plans.
“I was like 8/10ths of it done and I’m like, should I keep going another lap? And, of course, Anna was like, yeah, great, let’s do it!” Niko said and Anna laughed. The three of them decided to just keep going. They looped the lake a second time to complete Niko’s first 10k.
“It made me feel really good about myself that you know, I guess I can do this,” Niko said. “The perseverance and the resilience – never thinking that I can’t do something. This program has left me with – anything is possible. The goal is accomplishable.”
Anna said she knew he could do it, no problem. “I would have been proud had you finished the 5k, it would have been your first official race. But knowing what you had been through and how far you had come along, I kinda thought you might be up for taking it to that next level. And that you had the courage to challenge yourself because of what you have been for the past year and a half.”
Across the table from each other, remembering these stories, Niko looked at Anna and says he thinks of her as his “ate” (pronounced: ah-tay). In Filipino it means, elder, aunt, sister, mentor. He had never said this to her before and it means a lot to Anna.
“Every time you talk to me, I feel special. I hope you can continue being my mentor,” Niko said to Anna.
“I’m here for you, Niko. I really cherish our friendship,” she said in return.
